“‘While you have light, believe in the light, that you may be the children of light.’ These things spoke Jesus and departed, and did hide himself from them.” John 12:36
Right now I have moths and Greek words and secret treasure all swirling around in my mind together. And I’m searching for how they all fit together. And I’m searching for how they will all help me to understand better what it means to believe (pisteuo) in You, Jesus. Because there is so much more to You and to Your words than meets the eyes. You go so much deeper. And You are a Mystery and a Treasure worth selling everything for.
“While you have light, believe in the light, that you may be the children of light.” What does that really mean? I’m not so sure we can just take a verse, even one like this out of context of the verses around it. Well, I can. But I run the danger of misinterpretting or of just not getting as much from it as You are trying to tell me. In Proverbs 25:2 You tell us through Solomon, “It is the glory of God to conceal a thing: but the honour of kings is to search out a matter.” Hmm. Isn’t that something that You led me to this particular verse because there is that word “conceal” in Hebrew, “sathar.” And isn’t that one of the truths You have me searching into today? Lord, reveal what You have concealed for my uncovering. Let the adventure begin!
So, here You start by talking of light and if I read on down to verse 12:32 I see You add, “And I, if I be lifted up from the earth, will draw all men unto me.” And this is where the moths come flying around in my thinking. Moths are attracted to light, even to their detriment. Why? Why are moths attracted to light? And I found out that the same mechanism that attracts moths to light, repels cockroaches. Cockroaches flee light; moths are drawn to the light. I ask again, why? Scientists don’t know why. Some theories say it might be due to their migratory programming and it’s tied in to the moon, so they think the light is the moon, which they never expected to reach, and then wham!, there they are. Maybe flying toward the light (or the moon) is a better escape route than flying down into the darkness. Their eyes are more sensitive to responding to light and respond more slowly to darkness. So that question, “Why do moths fly into the light?” is left as a mystery for now.
But I’m not really interested in moths. I am interested in us as people and in You, Jesus, and in what You are trying to get me to understand here. So I’m going to start by looking at light and hopefully end up by looking into the Light. It’s the Greek word “phos” which is in our English words like phosphorous, and photo. God created light. It did not exist on its own. God is sovereign over light. Biblically, light is spoken of positively. It’s associated with wisdom and the Law of God. Worshipping God is dwelling in the light. Jesus, You announce to us that You are “the Light of the world.” John tells us that You are light and that You came into the world but that the world chose darkness instead. God is light. Fellowship with You is walking in the light.
And what if light is life? You say, “I am the way, the truth, and the life; no man comes unto the Father but by me.” (John 14:6) But You also say, “I am the light of the world: he that follows me shall not walk in darkness, but shall have the light of life.” What if part of what You are saying is, “While You are alive and while You have the Light (Me, Jesus) being shown to you, believe in Me unto new life, that You may enter into Me and I in You as My children of Light.”?
But here’s the thing. There’s no logical explanation to how I come to the Light other than by the power of God through Jesus Christ in the Holy Spirit. But that’s just it. That’s where I either become a moth or a cockroach. Because if I hop back to verse 12:32 You tell us, “And I, if I be lifted up from the earth, will draw all men unto me.” So, here You are telling of Your crucifixion. This is when You will be raised up like the moon to a moth, or the sun to the earth, or the Son of God to the salvation and rescue of my soul and whole being. So if all that You have been saying is true, and if this happens as was foretold (and it did) and You rise again from the dead, victorious, then You, by the power of Your Spirit will draw all people to You. Wow!
The sad thing is that some will resist. Because we don’t and we can’t come in our own power and in our own way. We only come by submitting to the Holy Spirit, by being sensitive to You. You draw all of us but some come and respond and some flee. And though most of the time in Scripture, this word “helkuo,” or “draw,” can mean to violently force like fish in a net or dragging someone before the magistrate, it’s not used that way in the context here. The Holy Spirit compels. Will I be compelled or will I choose to repel? Will I be a moth or a cockroach in my response to You? And what if it did mean the death of my self? But what if death of my self meant new, glorious life in You that way surpasses anything I knew and experienced before on my own?
Yes, I know what it is to be a moth. I was imagining being in Your light once while I was swimming in the ocean over a reef. And I wasn’t paying attention to anything but swimming in the light rays that were streaming through the water. Wham! I hit my head in the side of the catamaran (the large boat we came in). But I need to live in the Real Light, not imagine it. And I am so glad that You have made me Your child, a child of Light. That means that I have life and light. I have eternal life in You. I have Your life in me. That’s You in me! And that power that drew me to You, It’s in me, and it can draw others to You, not by dragging, but by warming them and filling them with You.
It’s interesting that You ended that thought by speaking these things and then departing and hiding yourself from the people. Which takes me back to that verse in Proverbs. Because You are concealed from us because we can only find You through the power of the Holy Spirit. Unless God opens our eyes, we won’t and can’t see You. Some of us want to do it our own way and on our own terms. But that doesn’t do it. You are Spirit and You are only revealed through the Spirit. You are a mystery, unobtainable to natural man. But, if I surrender to the Light, to Your life and illumination, then Your Spirit brings my Spirit to life and my eyes can see. You never hide or conceal Yourself because You are afraid. You conceal Yourself until the right time to make Yourself known for who You really are.
I wrote a story once called “Child of Darkness, Child of Light.” But I only wrote it because You wrote the true story first in my life. This is such a precious truth today, Lord. I am so grateful that You drew me to You. I am grateful for the way You reveal the Light that is You to me and to all those who respond to the drawing of Your Spirit. I’m not a moth; I’m not a cockroach; I’m something way better and something way more interactive with You. I’m a child of Light. And You invite me to live in the Light with You, to be part of the Light and to join in Your work with You. I live because of You. I see because of You. I don’t beat my head upon the light. You open Yourself up and invite me in and You come and dwell in me besides. I can’t think of a safer or more precious place to be, than living in the Light!