“The pride of your heart has deceived you…” Obadiah 1:3
Pride is a dangerous and destructive compeller. It’s more than an attitude and it’s deeper than character even though it’s both. It’s a driving force and seems to overtake whoever chooses to grasp it for their own. Once you grab, it seems to have you, and it’s awfully hard to shake loose from it once you realize how much it has a hold on you. But it can be done.
I wonder a lot about things. Now I’m thinking back on the time that Edom began, when Jacob and Esau were first born. They were twins within their mother’s womb. And they were so active in their mom’s womb that it was called “struggling together” and it really stressed her out so that she asked the Lord about it. And You already knew everything about those two baby boys, those leaders of two nations. One would be physically stronger than the other, yet the other would be under the rule of his “weaker” brother. And Esau started to come out first and was named, and as he was out, his brother, Jacob, had his little hand on Esau’s heal. Both babies were named according to how they looked or what they did as they came out. Esau-the rough one. Jacob- the heal catcher, supplanter.
I guess I just wonder how much of the boys’ attitudes were because it’s who they were and how much was because of the perceptions of the people around them. I mean, knowing Your words, that one would be stronger and one would rule the elder, wouldn’t it have been good to support that as something that could work together? I mean is it bad that Esau would be the strong one? And is it bad that the younger would have the better discernment to rule? What if Your words had been valued more than the traditions and desires of the forefathers or the parents? What if Isaac and Rebecca would have valued both abilities equally and shown the boys how to benefit each other by them? I wonder if that was an option? But I guess that’s a mute point, because it wasn’t the option taken.
And so, many years later we have the fruit of the competition continually growing. We have a nation fighting continually against his brother nation because of pride. We have a brother deceived into thinking what he is doing is right, who thinks his strength is because of himself and due to his own making. We have a brother who doesn’t get that his strength is from the Lord and only true strength when he finally submits to God and his brother because that is Your design. He has come to worship his own strength and to despise the God who gave it to him. He exalts himself like an eagle, but eagles can be brought down.
You didn’t say that there would be a stronger baby and the younger, weaker brother would rule if the stronger one was O.K. with that. You said, “This is how this will be.” Now, in anything You say, if we choose not to obey, or to disregard it and do it our own way, then we suffer the consequences that action naturally brings with it. We miss the blessing. The sad part here isn’t that it was just Esau’s choice. Their parents and society didn’t choose Your way either. That’s a hard concept to get that You get to choose who You will. That I might be called to serve someone else despite my “rights.” That I might have to use my gifts and talents to bring glory to something bigger than myself. That I might have to step into the background so someone else can be made much of by my strengths. What kind of crazy thinking is that, right?
So instead of choosing to fight for my brother, or my sister, or my husband, or my wife; instead of choosing to cover them and take the shame for their sake, I would choose to stand by like Esau and watch my brother be carried off. I would gloat over him or her getting what was coming to them. I would set them up for failure myself. I would watch and do nothing. I would rejoice when they hurt and suffered. I would gloat over how much I won in the divorce settlement. See, what You are sharing through Obadiah is prophetic. It happened and is still happening. It applies to the nation of Israel totally. But it also applies as a lesson in life to each of us. Because as Jacob and Esau go, so may we. Because it’s all about relationship.
Relationships based on us, fail. This was a relationship based on God. It should have flourished. But when we don’t line our thoughts up with Yours, this is what happens. Instead of lives filled with blessing and mutually beneficial relationships, we compete and hurt and damage and kill. But it didn’t have to be this way. And it doesn’t have to be this way now. The truth is, what goes around comes around. “[A]s you have done, it shall be done unto you: your reward shall return upon your own head.” Maybe keeping that thought in mind, would be enough to change our response to others. Do I want unforgiveness served back on my own head? How about bitterness? How about impatience? How about any of the actions or attitudes I show to that other person?
But the good news is that we can be delivered from this false thinking and this dangerous pride that causes us to choose wrongly. “Upon mount Zion shall be deliverance, and there shall be holiness…” Yes, a day is coming when God will restore Israel but You are also looking to deliver anyone who will trust Your way and let go of their own. You are offering deliverance to Jacob, and Esau, to Israel and to all nations. But we can only find deliverance upon mount Zion, Your way, through Jesus. We can only find deliverance by understanding that we have to let go of our ways and grab onto You and Your ways. I have to stop looking at the faults of my brothers and sisters and look to the perfection and wonder of You. I have to stop looking and thinking about my own strength and look at Your power and Your glory.
Ultimately, here’s the truth. We can call Mt. Zion the mount of Esau if we choose. We can call it Mt. Zion. But Mt. Zion in itself is not even for itself. Call it one or the other but the truth is, the “kingdom shall be the LORD’S.” Who does my kingdom belong to? Who does my family belong to? Who does my husband or wife belong to? Who does my house or my future or my ministry belong to? Do I get it? If what I’m calling mine, really belongs to You, I really need to change my perspective, don’t I?
Esau isn’t the only one paying a price. Isaac payed a price. Rebecca payed a price. Jacob payed a price. They all payed the price of broken relationship. Is that the price that I want to pay to hold onto my pride? No, I don’t want to pay that price. I want to learn. I want to learn to submit to You, Lord. And in learning to submit to You, I have to learn to submit to others. In learning to submit to You, I have to let go of my pride and care about others first. I have to use my strengths for the benefit of those around me and not for myself. If I really start to get it, I’d realize that in submitting, You, my Heavenly Father, would be my strength and my protector because I would be under Your ultimate authority. Yeah, I think the King of kings and Lord of lords can take care of me just fine. Help me to get it, Lord. Help me to understand the immeasurable value of humility.